I think the kids can sense that the end of pregnancy has drawn near.
This weekend as we left the fabric store Molly says, "I don't know how on earth you had enough energy to take me to the fabric store!?" for a moment I had a pang of guilt, I do tend to tell the kids I don't have a lot of extra energy, and have been feeling neglectful. We haven't been to the Y since before Thanksgiving, and we have barely been out of the house. We haven't been to church all of December or January.
The baby is sitting so low any sort of walking or sitting on any sort of surface is... rather uncomfortable.
Last night Sam came into our room and asked about his monthly project. "I need to know what date it is going to be, and I would like it to be before the baby is born." Well we have 21 days until they take the baby (if she doesn't come before then!) so I had him sit down and we sketched out a first rough draft.
Iris asked me last week while I was hanging some clothes in my closet if she could look at the baby's clothes, could she touch them, and then could she smell them. Both Iris and Lucy have lots of questions about when she will be here. It's an exciting time for all the kids. I realize this is probably the baby they will all remember the best. They'll remember her as an actual little baby and they'll remember her as a toddler. She is the last in a long line of wonderful little people and her birth heralds a newness. It feels so appropriate that she would be born in January, with February being dedicated to being home and learning about each other and learning how to be eat, and pass gas, and all those things babies take forever to learn. And then March, she will be a month or so old and we'll begin venturing out to explore our new city.
I can see the finish line, and it's so exciting. Last week at my appointment we decided that going back on my anti-anxiety meds is probably for the best. Hormones... plus my increased inactivity... AKA not vacuuming twice a day, washing cupboards and definitely not cleaning my fridge out every week has seriously been such a struggle. When you have OCD you can't just let things go, so this has been a challenge. However, since taking the new prescription I've been able to sleep, which has made me have a bit more energy and I ALMOST feel better now than I have through my whole entire pregnancy. I'm still taking the medication for hypermesis 3x a day, which also greatly helps. I even think being able to sleep again has helped my hip pain, since I'm not tossing and turning constantly.
Over all, everything is working out and everything is going pretty smoothly. I was able to hit my goal of gaining an appropriate amount of weight, thought I think almost every pound is accounted for by the baby and all the extra fluids, and what not that accompany a pregnancy. 11 pounds. And it feels good. I feel healthy. This is my first pregnancy where I've gained "so much". I generally just lose weight and become weak and pitiful.
The cradle arrived from the farm this weekend. It is a cradle my Dad refinished when I found out I was pregnant with Sam. It's very sturdy and just feels so much like a place a baby should rest. All of my kids up to Lucy slept in it, and then my sister became pregnant with Jack, and I passed it to her. In the last 4 years she's had 4 babies and now it's our baby's turn again. I'm not a materialistic sentimental person, once I'm done with things I love to pass them on. I don't have anything for this baby that the boys or Molly used, so this is just something kind of sweet, and makes me a little sentimental... this is it for us.
I've packed my hospital bag as well, bought new slippers, found my bathrobe tie, (does anyone else constantly lose theirs too??) and purchased a new loofa.
Since the baby and I are doing so well, I've talked with the specialists and all of that and we decided that unless something changes, I would be able to birth her naturally, and on my own time... until 39 weeks, then my time is up and we will try a "gentle" induction and if that doesn't work we'll use pit, with a possibility of a c-section. That's the most okay with me. I can handle that.
So now we just need a name!