NaBloPoMo#12

Six months. It's passed so quickly. It's so unfair. So much has happened that I can hardly write about it.


Six pounds even, she arrives with dark curly hair.


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I will never forget the morning we brought her home. The kids were all so surprised. Molly asked, "Is she alive!?" When I told her to peek into the bassinet; she was as cute and tiny as a little doll.


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There was a miracle, when I decided to bring her to the ER for pooping too much. She was actually quite sick. A blood infection, too little red blood cells... something we combat still. My heart was broken, I had such plans for  peace. I wanted her to come into the world quietly, handled by only those who love her to her very core... but instead I sat next to her incubator not able to touch her, but watched as she developed a rash, dry skin, hooked up to lines. I had to thank God every day that this was all that was wrong. I know so many many more things can go wrong. I had to remember that it wasn't as bad as it could have been.


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Our first trip to the park and we found the most perfect tree which had it's roots out, almost asking to hold her.


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First time at the beach; we went with the Hugs, both Elizabeth and I still working out the kinks in having infants, I'm not sure we really talked. I think we both just sat there bleary eyed and being grateful our kids were happily playing in the water... away from us.


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100 days came so quickly. I wasn't ready.


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The first time she reached for a toy, the same day she reached for Molly's hand. I hope to never forget them holding hands; Molly cooing at her baby sister and Iris looking deep into Molly's eyes. God, I hope they always love each other this much.


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I'm not her favorite. She has many favorites.


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We found out she is allergic to milk; our last nursing session almost killed me. I held her for two hours in the rocking chair in our bedroom while she slept. I couldn't stop looking at her. This was it.


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And now we're here.


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As I paced the floor waiting for Iris Sophia to arrive I couldn't imagine a second past that moment. Who was she going to be? What would she look like?
And now I know; she's exactly what I wanted.


And now it's been six months.


11/12/2011
15lbs 2oz


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