This is not an illusion! I have returned to the internet world!! I am once again, connected!! I am so very blessed to have such a beautiful house and already I feel such pride in tidying and keeping up with the laundry, though I know the time will come soon when I've run out of patients with the daily monotonous cleaning, for now I am full of joy as I load the dishes into our dish washer and can even find joy in cleaning toilets.
Since we've moved into our corner of the world I have seen such a transformation in the kids and in myself that I am eager to wake up every morning and no longer feel the weight of hopelessness. Our life is good. I am so proud to be a mother to my wonderful 4, soon to be 5 children. They are such funny little people, I have enjoyed (Yes, ENJOYED!) spending the last week with them here after Jerry has left for work. We have a very nice rhythm here and it helps so very much to have large windows that let the light in and give us ques to our next activities.
I have seen the biggest difference in Lucy since moving here. She is the happiest person you can imagine. She is always smiling, always. She loves to go outside and brings her tiny muck boots and her helmet to me multiple times a day. She is getting great with our routine too and happily runs into the bathroom after dinner for her bath. She seems to find joy in so much. The morning after we moved here I sat and cried tears of joy as I opened the box of baby toys and watched her enjoy each one. She now loves her ball popper, which she received for her birthday and was scared of. She tries to shove all sorts of things down it to see if they too will pop. She loves the space to run, the toys, the closets to hide in. She loves to climb into her seat for meals and immensely enjoys going outside. She is such a curious little baby and gets into everything she can. I don't mind, I've baby proofed everything and the things she gets into will not harm her and will not break.
We really struggled while at my aunt's house with the kids' night time routine. Sam, Joe and Molly were sharing a bedroom and it was always such a giant fight to get them to bed. I know there were a lot of things contributing to this, one of it being their constant pent up energy that never had space to run out. Since moving here I've started putting the kids to bed at nine instead of eight since our day is much more full. I don't find myself counting the minutes until bed time as they're happily playing or reading. Again, there were joyful tears the first day I tucked them in with my fingers crossed and not one person came out for one more drink or having to go potty again. Molly and Lucy are now sharing a room and it has been absolutely great! They enjoy giggling with each other and fall asleep very peacefully. The boys are aloud to talk as long as they'd like with the stipulation they are not loud and it seems within 30 minutes they're sleeping.
All of these things leave me feeling peaceful. My patients for their silly antics has shot up and I find myself laughing at their jokes and helping them build forts or set up train tracks. I've enjoyed eating dinner at the table with them again and don't feel myself needing breaks away from them. I have found myself needing more sleep but I am sure that has more to do with the little person I am growing than with the decimals of my children's voices.
It hasn't been easy though. The move was tough, the kids were so very tired that first day here and with nothing unpacked there were lots of tears shed. Getting our mail here, transferring the garbage and utilities into our names, everything has taken such a long time. Especially with the horrible phone issues we've had. We get NO cell phone reception out at the house. It is true, we are out a ways but I wasn't expecting the complete cut off from civilization. Jerry's drivers license expired and it took a full morning to get all that sorted out! But after a week of working every morning on all those things and every night of unpacking, cleaning and setting in we are feeling more settled.
We have had quite a few surprises already here. We found on our second morning that we had a terrible ant infestation which took about 3 days to clear up. After several days of spraying and setting our live bait ant traps we bombed. I haven't seen any ants since then so I am really hoping they're gone! The day after the ant bombing we had a storm over here and it knocked our power out. For 4 hours. While Jerry was at work. Though it was the afternoon the kids were panicked not being able to have lights on. We opened the curtains and it was bright enough but they could not be appeased. Molly whimpered for about 2 hours and Joe cried for the hour before it came on, so we had two hours of candle light and when the lights came back on we made smores. Sam had been such a trooper until the electricity came back on but then our alarm system kept notifying us that the fire alarms were on back up battery and every time it beeped Sam was sure we were being invaded by “people who are going to shoot us”. I don't even know where he came up with that kind of thinking. What a pessimist. I told him over and over the only reason we have an alarm is to know when someone has opened a door, say if Lucy were to sneak out of the house we would know she had left and we wouldn’t lose her. He wasn't buying it, but that's really my reason. Ha!
That same night our bathroom flooded and the bathtubs backed up. Gross. I had no way to contact anyone and was so very annoyed. I used all the towels to mop up the water and then it would flood again and I ended up just having to leave the master bathroom with water on the floor!! The kids kept saying someone was peeing all over the floor, which made me laugh. I had originally thought maybe it was the power outage effecting the pump house, but today when I washed all those towels and was finally able to do dishes it did the same thing and the bathrooms are flooded again. At least this time it happened after the kids went to bed and I didn't have to think of all the horrors of children and a backed up toilet. Our house was not smellin' pretty, let me tell you and I was beyond happy when this morning everything seemed to be working again. But now I'm back to peeved... because it's worse tonight that it was yesterday. Eventually it will be cleared up and I'll be investing my small amount of energy in finishing my unpacking.