It's a beautiful day.

I'm out of milk. No tea.

It's overcast. So overcast in fact that the sky is almost black. Such a deep grey... I'm not sure I've ever really seen that color. Such dark grey that the air looks grey. The grass is beautiful even, a special kind of emerald green. Everything is wet which makes it all look darker. But it's so beautiful.

I walked the garbage out through the yard and under the grape arbor. The air is thick, like breathing into a steam bath. Only it's pretty cold, so it's not really like a steam bath, but I can't think of anything that gives off thick air like this.

I feel like this is a good metaphor of my life. It feels dark and it's a little bit hard to breath. And let's be honest, I feel a little bit depressed. I'm kind of stuck in a little house with only a few of the kids' toys, which they got bored of last week and no car. I've been spending all my time that I don't do the dishes or change the baby who has diarhea this week and needs to be changed about every 10 minutes watching "Grey's Anatomy". Ya know, it doesn't feel like a very fulfilling life right now. I don't have any craft projects to work on, no house projects to do. The kids are bored. out. of. their. minds. Do you know what kids do when they're bored out of their minds? I'll tell you. They dump out drawers and get into cupboards and they pull apart little helpless plants which I'm pretty sure my Aunt was very emotionally attached to.

Joe is in time out for dumping all the toys we own into the bath tub. Sam is in his bed because he's moping around and I think if I had to see his mopey face again I'd just slap him. So anyway, that's where he is. Molly is in the bath tub and was being so loud it woke Lucy up and now where are we?

Gone crazy. Be back... eventually.

Comments

  1. Oh hon. I'm so sorry. I find it hard to visit and stay a weekend in someone else's house because it isn't "home" and the kids go crazy. I cannot imagine day after day after day.

    Hang in there - soon enough you will find a place of your own and be able to settle in to a life you love.

    Is Sam not going to school yet?

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  2. You need to get out of the house! Out of the house all by yourself! Don't you remember how nice it was having regular Mom's Nights? Speaking of which I realized the other day that when you moved, even just the first time to the valley, my MNO went down by about a million! My last pedicure was with you last summer! Make a date with yourself and get out of the house, go get your toes done or see a movie or something! No excuses! :)

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